-Changes-

Hello to you my Friends, I can’t believe it was couple months since I wrote, only the reason I was silence was trying to accept the different changes our lives are going through..Our God is the same yesterday today and for always- But when we make changes its a long process for me to accept and enjoy that this is what God wants best for us as a Family..

School~ A big change to our family- yes I am doing the HomeSchooling! can you believe that ? I always thought people were very strange Homeschooling – their poor children- More less because I was taught it was kind of ish wrong ;( ..And I would NEVER do that – OOps when you say NEVER you end up doing it!..the reason for Homeschooling- Tuition was our Biggest plus Hoping to taking our Family to my Birth Country this winter we knew full well we cant pay school and go on a trip..Tuition is Pricey and I am Happy for those who can afford it , but since Anthony’s truck rolled our Bills are more -we had asked twice for help in the church we had attended But….We have concluded its something Anthony n I will have to work together in and we will come out on top of this all..

Church- Yes our Family  is where we are trying to figure out where we belong!..Church was always an Issue for me I never have much good to say about church growing up it was a struggle there was always issues -and my Dad was a Bishop- people were never behaving it was a mess – I got a wrong view of it all and didn’t want to be part of it ever- but then I gave it a try and it would go good until my sleeves weren’t long enough someone saw me wearing sandals instead of shoes and socks the list went on and on..I would of never dreamed that a year ago we would be in the same shoes again but because of a Different reason A reason that is neither tight or wrong on how you believe on the subject of  REBAPTIZED – It sadden us so much and it hurt us much to that we could not just agree to disagree but no it was this way or no way..we also have learned to have to be different can be good to Jesus was different He hung out with the lowest of lowest He wasn’t thought of much He dwelled with them who accepted Him – Our Biggest struggle is ‘ where Do I belong?.. maybe one day I can answer that question

Family-  The Best part, even though we drive each other Crazy at times and we wonder why God up in Heaven put us in This Family , In the last year our Family has went through much pain more then you realize- Because when we are around you we put our happy faces on just like you do!! But Losing a Mom and a Grandma was really tough on us and still is we have our way of dealing with pain which can make us moody grumpy and don’t touch me! a phrase our girls use lots ..Also in March My Sweet Husband took me to my Birth Counrty and we found MY Birth mom – We would love to share our story on that if you ever want to hear it- and with finding my Family it has lots of ups and downs then you can imagine but you cant because this is my life my story we are all made different how we deal with things..

May you all have a Blessed day ~ May you feel God’s Love surround you whatever you are facing today ~ May you know God cares and loves you very much

 

 

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~ WORDS ~

Words can build you up-Words can break you down-Start a fire in your heart or put it out-Let my words be life -Let my words be truth … Every word I speak about someone or to someone brings life or death, Our words are so powerful that they are times we don’t realize what we just did with words that’s were spoken negative towards a person , we like to use the excuse we are sharing a CONCERN about someone-which is GOSSIP which is a SIN but many people like to categorize SIN murder immorality stealing and we make people stand up front and repent of them sins but when there is GOSSIP or SLANDER we justify ever word we say BOTH are SIN…

Many times also we ASSUME things and we like to convince other people that other people are wrong! And that gives us grounds to JUDGE and share a CONCERN and we start SLANDERING the person without proof!

Couple weeks ago this played out..The children were happily playing baseball one of the players was blowing their nose unknown to the person a ball was coming their way and missed it which made the players on that team all mad because a ball was missed and very unkind words were spoken to the person -unknown to the team mates the person was blowing their nose they didn’t take the time and ask the person why/what happened that you missed the ball-instead they kept saying negative words to the person how they were a failure which of course the brain grasp and hit all the brain cells convincing the person they are weird they are stupid they don’t know how to play ball and yes they are no good – it ruined the game, the day, had that person in tears that they choose to go home      ~WORDS~

My hearts goes out to be who have been wounded because words that hurt bring pain.Words of love and encouragement bring LIFE and HAPPINESS..We all Thrive for acceptance why is it so hard to give it to other people why don’t we want other people to exceed beyond us?

Couple weeks ago a person who I attended church with at one time told me to my face that I am lost its because of your background its so sad you could have amounted to someone..them words were like a sharp knife to my heart something I had to work through words that I had to renounce and not allow in my heart because it was not truth! it made other words start coming to my mind that I heard I am surprised you amounted to anything I figured you wouldn’t – You need help and I will gladly pitch money in for you to go-you are bad-you are a disgrace-and many other words I wont mention, My Husband also was told Negative words Negative words were said into our Marriage and our children and oh the pain them words had over us but oh the joy we have once we renounced all them agreements that them words had over us..My cry is to each of you is think before you say something negative about a person- what if every word we said would come to pass !!

So when you meet someone speak words of life into them start the ripple of LOVE It only takes one spark to get a fire going and many people can find warmth in the fire . One smile can change a person’s day a message of encouragement can encourage that person to encourage another person -it takes one second for trust to be broken and many years for you to regain it back!

~ Answered Prayers~

‘Let Me help you through this day.The challenges you face are far to great for you to handle alone .You are keenly aware of your helplessness in the schemeof events you face .This awareness opens up a choice: to doggly go it alone or to walk with Me in hubble steps of dependence. Actually, this choice is continually before you, but difficulties highlight the decision-making process. So, consider it all joy whenever you are envelopes in various trails. Theses are gifts from Me, reminding you to rely on Me alone.

This was in My devotions Monday morning March 7th -in Honduras- after searching for my Family for two days and feeling like we are going in circles and the circle was getting smaller and smaller and just maybe God doesn’t want me to find my Birth family -May be there isn’t any Family anymore ..But I knew way down deep in my heart I have a sister and Mom is still living ..But I felt like God was telling me give it all up the dream of ever meeting them I have the perfect plan , not in your timing But in My timing ,and if the hour of departure arrives in less then 48 hours and we still haven’t found them you have to be okay with it its not in your Control but in Mine.So I reread my devotions and I gave it ALL up I was done I wanted to enjoy the last two days ,somehow I was going to remove the thought of finding them far from my mind……7 hours later Tears of Joy, Tears of Laughter, Overwhelmed, Blessed , Prayers Answered, …… my brain was overloaded trying to process everything in a short amount of time!!

Thank-you To My Heavenly Father Who did it all in His Awsume timing!! For My Sweet Lovable Husband Who Fullfilled my dream come true who stood beside me through it all I can never Thank him enough I am so Proud of him! My Family loved him to pieces my Mamma Lidia said ‘you have a great Husband that he took the time and brought you to your Home country to help you find your Family’ ..And also to our Friends Jeremiah & Sandra Martin ThankYou!!..traveling the extra miles talking to people going here going there phone calls the Love support the many Prayers We/You prayed and for not giving up!! We love you..

Many people want to hear Our story How God has worked in Our Lives the ups and downs we had to face This is God’s story and we want to give Him all glory and Honor Through sharing it

 

He got the whole world in His hand

Hello to you all.. Isnt it wonderful know Jesus Father got the whole world in His hand ? He got me and you the tiny little babies Everybody in His hand! wow its so Awsume!!!…

Lots of things have been Happening in our lives , not all good and not all bad either sometimes though its easier to pick out the negative then the positive , not kool. you know though with them bumps in our paths they are teaching us to cling closer and deeper unto our Heavenly Father, so many times when things are going good its easier for me to think I have it all under control and How must God feel Rejected? Do I like being rejected ? do I like when People ignore me? just like the flowers need the rain and sunshine So I need my Abba Father..

My Family was together here in Feb going through my mom’s things , oh how precious some items were and to part with them seemed so unfair..We shared tears of joy and tears of pain of parting closing another chapter -I don’t want to close it- it seems soo unfair why did God have to chose my parents why both of them!..it was bittersweet somehow the bitter over ruled the sweet ..sometimes it just feels like pain rules everything and through the jumble of it all God is in the midst of it and will carry us through!!

Yesterday-sunday- was such a BEAUTIFUL day!! My love in life was Bubbling over the sun the fresh air -New Beginnings- even the birds were extra happy , Even mamma was to and that made everyone else oh so HAPPY  😉  its so amazing what a Mom can do isn’t it?! we went bike riding and went to feed the fish but they were still sleeping ,but Lakoda had fun watchin his cherrios float down to the creek then drop them on one side of the bridge and run over to the other side and see them floating by ..in the evening we had friends come over and had a good time catching up in each others life and encouraged each other to keep God always number one in our lives no matter what!

And now its packing time coming up..I cant believe the time is approaching for us to head for Honduras still don’t seem real its like its hasn’t hit me yet that its actually happening! but once my feet hit solid ground after two Airplane rides I will be Excited! nope I not a fan of them Big planes  ;( I keep praying that the fear of Flying will leave me!!..and to totally trust God through this…The unknow is a little scary what does God has in store for us to open that door will be a whole new awakening now already I feel like God is getting us ready for something to be used for Him… Pray also for our children one already is in tears she don’t wanna go to her sitter and that’s when its tough the little boy is assuming he is going right along to ‘Me to fly ‘ he says breaks this mamma’s heart I keep telling him next time buddy you will go with..oh my I have tears as I write this they are a part of me and I feel that they should be taking this all in with me but it takes lotts of money to fly everyone I pray and hope that we can do that some day here soon take our whole family!……….The Best part of this is a friend offered to take us and pick us up from the Airport its all crazy how that worked out having this conversation with Anthony like what shud we do park there ? do this or that? n I was sweepin the floor n praying to God it would be so nice if somehow you could help us in less then an Hr someone text I wanna take you to the airport just way to good to be true 😉

Well May you all have a Blessed week ,My Jesus/Father/God  be with you always , Let Him be number ONE in your life!!  ..love to you all

FLAWLESS

‘No matter the BUMPS no matter the BRUISES no matter the SCARS, still the TRUTH stands the Cross has made you FLAWLESS, no matter the HURT or how deep the Wound is no matter the PAIN still the TRUTH is The Cross has made you FLAWLESS’……This song I probably listen to every day ,and then to watch my 3year old singing it pretty well from word to word makes me smile ,cause He knows no matter what he does His mom dad,and sisters still love Him! and that’s how Abba Father looks at me!..No matter what I have done no matter where I have been He still Loves me and No matter what people say about me I am still LOVED by Jesus :)..

Looking over the last year 2015 there were many many Bumps many Hurts many Pain But like the Picture word I walked through last week was so real n gave me Peace, My Hubby and I are going through a Marriage counseling session~ Nope we aren’t perfect and Live Happily Ever After we still struggle and since we haven’t  been taught things we should of had when we got Married,But we give God Honor and Glory for Loving us and Helping us, We wanna keep Learning n Growing, but with it came lots of Bruises, Scars, Bumps and Pain~ and through the process bringing my pain to Jesus telling Him about all the hurts ,He looked at me and with tears in His eyes He showed me His Feet and Hands I totally saw where the nail went through it was bleeding and I could see all the way through and then it started healing over and there was the SCAR, It will always be there He said ‘The hurt the pain the scar but look its all HEALED’!…

And yes God can Heal Marriages and make what was intended to be not workable turn it around and make it Beautiful!, but only when you are Broken and willing to give God all the Broken pieces and let Him work in your Life.

So my Prayer for you is that you know that there is Hope you are not Hopeless no matter what you have done or what people may say about you! ~Don’t let the fear of man rule you and weigh you down! ~..Abba Father suffered more then we can ever imagine! and His last words were before He died ‘Father Forgive them for they know not what they do’..He choose to give Everything to God….Blessings and love

Peace with God

Hello Hello from my Little corner of this world!!..yes I have been silent for a while, Why? Because of the things Life had/has to offer and sorting through it all.. My Life feels like a Big jumbo puzzles floating around and yes I wish I could ignore them all but If only they be smaller then I cud tuck them away out of sight..But no I was reminded you have to deal with the pain work through it cry about it to Start the Healing process..And I still kept asking WHY and then one morning for Devotions ~ can you Believe it! God started speaking to me ..’saying I am the Prince of Peace , You need My Peace each Moment to Accomplish My Purposes in your life!!!- Psalms 25:4 NKJV- Ask for direction, When we are willing to seek God, learn from His Word and obey His commandments, then we will receive His guidance- Instead of asking WHY!!…

This is so what I needed because a week later I met with a long-a-ago Friend who offered Out of this world exciting NEWS to our Family- God’s perfect timing!!.. And it all has to do with My Adoption !!!!!!!!!! : )

Our Family is doing well..Girls are enjoying school but looking forward to Christmas vacation , so am I :)…Anthony is Busy working at the Furniture store and Enjoying it , plus keeping  his Family in order is a chore !!!..He attends Encourge Men every Tuesday morning if he can and is involved in The Young Men from Church Bible study which is all amazing and sometimes hard to believe at times -He has another whole story of His life before knowing who Jesus was in his life- sometimes I feel like I am married to a stranger in a good way 🙂 …Koda and I keep the house standing while everyone else is away during the day..We attend MOPS every other week and so BLESSED with the new friends we made and then every Wensday if we can we go to our Local Library for storytime and also spend time  with the Community Ladies  that we made friends with I really enjoy that…

My house smells so Lovely 6 loaves of fresh baked bread ..Chocolate chip cookies and Chocolate oatmeal cookies cooling!!  and for Dinner we are having Taco salad and then off to a Friends house for the eve.

HIGHLIGHTS for this week…Christmas shopping with My Mom’s 3 sisters ..A friend coming and spending the day with mw…Bible study Friends at Timeless Cafe’….. Anthony taking his 3 daughters Shopping :)…Girls Christmas Program..And spending time togather as a FAMILY.

 

~ tears~

‘And God shall wipe away all tears’.. A day I am looking forward to a day where all is Peaceful and Happy and to be reunited with Love ones..

Its a year ago this week that we found out that our Dear Mom has cancer..I can still remember that whole day..Full of sadness ..Something inside of me said ‘she will not die she can’t die, I need her We need her!!..’…I lost my ‘Birth’ Mom there is no way I can give my ‘Adopted’ MOM up God please NO!…and I still am struggling with having to let her go it don’t seem fair……I have an Awsume friend who sent me a phone Hug Yesterday not knowing that it was my parents Anniversary and  that I was having a Really rough day….I Thank~God for Special Friends like that …

Grief can make us seem very selfish focused only on the people we lost ignoring our loved ones around us not aware of the hurt and loss. We stare blank at people when they speak, life totally feels dark and bleak.it isn’t that we don’t care it isn’t that we don’t want to take part. We just need time to adjust and learn How to live with a Broken Heart.

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I know some of you were looking forward to me sharing more on My Adoption ..I will but not right now…. Sharing the other week on My Adoption Story with My MOPS group went great and it was another step to Healing .. ..But with it came Negative and I am still sorting through that… and also Positive and with That I am Thrilled about !!!!

Our Family is Hoping & Praying that 2016 We can travel To My BIRTH Country  Honduras  ~ We know that God will Provide for us ~  tickets aren’t cheap with a Family of 6 ..But we are EXCITED and it will be a DREAM come true to Finally See where I was born to walk the streets to see the little children that are of my Blood and last but not Least will I found any of My Family?

Each of you have a Blessed day ~